from the archives

For a second, I couldn't find the files for my grad school thesis anywhere. Thank God I found them on my external hard drive. Enjoy this old precious gem.

Change

Consider the hau tree
positioned crookedly
on the side of the
red dirt road,
heart-shaped leaves,
buds blooming yellow
in quiet early morning,
orange under midday sun,
and, by nightfall, red
petals lying in the road-
dissolving into clay.

sandy times

I keep finding sand on my bed! Very unsettling for a clean freak like myself. I think I even chewed on a bit of sand a few minutes ago - how did it get in my mouth?? And now I'm listening to a song called Sacred Sands... Soon I'll have a sand carpet and and I'll sleep between sand sheets, and when guests come over and go to pour themselves a glass of water, sand will come out of the faucet. The ocean house becomes the sand house!

a little kick

Sometimes that's what you need to re-examine your life. It's painful, but maybe this came at the right time. Viv thinks I am projecting my own thoughts onto him, but even if I am, it's not such a bad thing to ask yourself why you aren't doing the things you want to with your life. I thought I was doing a lovely job of hiding the uncertain time that I'm going through right now, but those things have their ways of coming out whether you want them to or not. And I thought it would've been nice to have someone to help me out of it, to make it a little easier... But I can be brave and do it alone, too.

no hope, no harm

I'm sure all mimosa and Smiths-loving girls like to play that song after suffering a disappointment.